Tuesday, September 01, 2009


There is only one man in my life who still has the ability to push my buttons and send me over the edge. Not one of my boys nor my very special friend can have me grinding my teeth and reaching for a stiff drink the way my father can.

My relationship with my father has been a whirlwind of extremes. Right up to my sixth birthday I was daddy’s favorite girl. Then just like that something changed. By the time I was sixteen I’d declared him my worst enemy and he wasn’t too happy with me either. When I married the ex-hubby my father didn’t talk to me for three years, not even to say hello.

Over the years daddy and I have established boundaries with each other that we know not to cross. It’s a very rare occasion that we bump heads and when we do we typically don’t bump heads but so hard, most especially since the old guy had his stroke. I know I haven’t been the greatest daughter but I’ve been more mindful about trying to be a good one.

And just like that something changed, again. Nothing makes the man happy and everything I do seems to grate on his last nerve. Once again I’m getting the silent treatment and for the first time I don’t think I did anything wrong to deserve it.

So now I’m grinding my teeth, tossing back shots of Jack like its water, and wondering, short of being five years old, what is it going to take to be my daddy’s favorite girl again.

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