Saturday, November 29, 2008


The Santa Baby 2008 Virtual Book Tour is coming to a computer screen near YOU!

All The Buzz Reviews ( and The GRITS COM Literary Service ( have teamed up to host the Santa Baby 2008 Virtual Book Tour headlining some of today’s exciting African American romance writers, December 1-12, 2008! This exclusive ten-day virtual book tour will give avid romance readers, and new readers to the genre, a chance to hear from ten popular writers about their new and upcoming book releases just in time for the holidays!

This virtual book tour is inspired by the sultry sex-kitten, Eartha Kitt. Her Christmas song, “Santa Baby,” topped the charts in 1953 making her one of the most popular entertainers in the world. So we’re very excited to have her perform her chart-topping song just for you below (an animation produced by F. C. Snow) in celebration of this virtual book tour!

The same sensuous mix that Eartha Kitt brought to this Christmas song many years ago, is the same sensuous mix - Gwyneth Bolton, Niobia Bryant, Dyanne Davis, Gwynne Forster, Bettye Griffin, Donna Hill, Andrea Jackson, Deborah Fletcher Mello (Me!!!), Farrah Rochon, and Stefanie Worth -bring to their work and to this tour!

Romance novels made an astonishing $1.4 billion last year, making the genre one of the top sellers in the publishing industry. Though some complain that the formulaic plot and “happily-ever-after” endings in romances aren’t always indicative of real life; the staggering number of romances sold each year is testament to its popularity and staying power!

The Santa Baby 2008 Virtual Book Tour begins Monday, December 1, 2008. So get ready!

Friday, November 28, 2008


Connecting with family over the holidays is always an experience. After a meal of too much turkey and more than my fair share of pie I usually walk away with a full stomach and an even fuller heart. This Thanksgiving was no exception and it reminded me of holidays past when I’d bake and cook for days on end to prepare a mammoth menu that would inevitably be consumed in less than an hour’s time. The difference this year though was I didn’t cook a thing. What remained constant was that the fellowship was exceptionally heartfelt.

For over 26 years the ex-hubby never attended family functions. Correction. He never attended MY family functions. I can literally count on one hand the number of times he graced my family with his presence and I’d still have three fingers left over. This past summer at the family reunion, an elderly aunt asked me when I planned to marry. When I told her I’d recently gotten divorced she looked at me as if I’d lost my mind. The women gathered at her side had no recollection of any marriage involving me and another party and none of them had never ever met the man. Amazingly, within my own family ranks, those who knew he actually existed were far and few between.

I vowed that I would never again involve myself with a man who had no interest in socializing with my family. I don’t expect that every weekend and every holiday should be with my kin folk but there would need to be a willingness to at least sit across the table and break bread with them every now and again.

I understand that balancing two families can be a chore but I would hope that celebrating with one side and not the other wouldn't have to be the decision of choice. One reason I so readily cooked and hosted the holiday meals in the past was to bring our two families together to prevent the dissention that going elsewhere would surely have brought.

An acquaintance wasn’t totally happy with her holiday experience. She had hoped her boyfriend would at least stop by her parent’s home to say hello before they continued on to his family’s home for the holiday meal. She wasn't expecting him to stay for any length of time, but to just acknowledge the invitation that they had extended when they'd so graciously invited him to their home. Instead, he bypassed her folks altogether, not even suggesting they stop by for a quick hello.

I could only commiserate so much because I didn’t understand why, if that was what she wanted, she didn’t just make the suggestion herself and move on. She explained however that she didn’t want him to feel pressured and it had become clear over the past year, with each invitation that he'd disregarded or made excuses for, that her man wasn’t much interested in her family. I explained that there should have been no pressure in simply voicing what she wanted and that a man not much interested in her family wasn’t much interested in her.

I had much to be thankful for this year and I was much thankful for a perfect holiday that involved lots of family, lots of love, and a very special friend who made the whole experience one I’ll always remember. I could not have asked for anything more.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008


I don’t know her real name. She would seem to be a very young woman but she has clearly not aged well. She’s fallen victim to her addictions and her whole carriage embodies the difficult times and rough roads she’s had to traverse in her lifetime. But she has an engaging smile and there is a buoyancy to her deep, alto voice that you don’t expect. There is an air of antiquity to her face, like that of an old soul and that makes me think she would have an old name, something simple and elegant, as I imagine she could have been under different circumstances. I call her Naomi.

Naomi walks the streets talking to herself. Her conversations always seem heated as she gestures with her hands, her head waving excitedly from side to side. Naomi never seems to notice the odd stares and deep frowns people toss in her direction. If you catch her eye she will be your friend, racing to your side to ask for a dollar to buy herself a meal. Naomi is always hungry and I suspect that what Naomi yearns for has little to do with a hot biscuit and cup of coffee.

Naomi rushed in to the store today to exchange four quarters for a dollar bill. Then she asked for two to tide her over for the holiday. Naomi was excited about her future. She’s headed to prison in a few short days to serve time for a number of charges. The only one she proudly claims is her drunk and disorderly conviction. Naomi was excited because it’s cold outside and in prison she’ll get three square meals per day and a blanket and bed at night.

“Gots ta’ be thankful!” Naomi proclaimed excitedly. “God is good,” she concluded as she waved goodbye, promising to come visit again as soon as she got out of jail. Naomi was grinning broadly, her face brimming with joy, gratitude shimmering from her eyes.

Naomi is grateful that prison will move her from the streets to a place with four walls and a cot. Watching her skip across the parking lot, waving excitedly at strangers as she shouted out Thanksgiving greetings, moved me to tears.

I called a friend to tell her about my experience with Naomi. Glenda was headed out of town, anxious to be as far from holiday cheer as she can get. She lost a cherished family member many years back and the holidays no longer hold any joy for her. Glenda will once again spend her holiday mourning her losses as she sits alone on some island getaway. She couldn't fathom that there are people in her life who want to share in her many blessings this year and have her share in theirs.

As you gather around your pretty tables with family and friends this season, be ever so mindful of all those little blessings that we sometimes take for granted. Few of us were privileged to have had an easy time this year. Most of us are still suffering through our individual hardships, understanding that we still have a long way to go. But even Naomi recognizes that there is always something to be grateful for. I wish my my dear friend Glenda could.

Happy Thanksgiving! May you each have a safe and blessed holiday.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008


Kelly and I were talking about being lonely. There was a hurt that resonated in her words and my heart when she asked if one ever truly gets over loneliness.

We rationalized that loneliness can be a cruel companion if you allow it to be. It can wear down your energy and beat away your spirit. Recognizing that loneliness isn’t about being alone is that light bulb moment when you have to admit that you’re not only unsatisfied with the people in your life, but that you’re also unsatisfied with yourself. Getting over loneliness begins with learning how to enjoy your own solitude. It’s about being confident with who you are, how you feel, and what you want for yourself. It's also about knowing who you want to share yourself with.

Both Kelly and I acknowledged that loneliness can move a person to look for illogical amusements. But temptations like drugs and alcohol only leave you numb, and meaningless sex becomes easy and empty. They almost always leave you unsatisfied, still craving something more meaningful that will make you feel whole and confident.

Reflecting back on our lives and our own moments of loneliness we both recognized that we’ve come a long way. Being alone no longer invokes feelings of doom and catastrophe, when being alone feels like a death sentence. Neither of us is desperate for attention or camaraderie. Not like before.

But we admit to still having our moments when companionship is missed and there are moments of longing. We’re proud that we’ve made great progress but we admit…we still have our moments.

Monday, November 17, 2008


Ginger has some issues. At the age of nineteen she’s already a single mother trying to raise a young child on her own. Ginger recently left her baby-daddy, unhappy with their situation. Ginger left, barely giving herself twenty-four hours before jumping from one man’s bed right into another’s. Ginger insists she didn’t leave her baby-daddy for her boyfriend but hey, you know what they say about it looking like a duck. Her story is quacking all over the place.

Now she’s confused and having doubts. Ginger proclaimed to the world that she might have actually made a mistake but it was too late to go back. I’m thinking that maybe Ginger should have thought about that before she pulled that other man and other people into her mess. And it has truly become one hell of a mess with battle lines being drawn and threats of war raging in the air.

The men caught up in Ginger’s mess are both naive, believing they’re the best and only for my girl. I, on the other hand, know they could both do better than Ginger if they were so inclined. I couldn’t help but note the lies Ginger so readily tells her baby-daddy, knowing that if she’ll lie to one, she will surely lie to the other. She’s telling them both just what they want to hear and not an ounce of it is based on truth. Sadly, neither man seems to have a clue.

I am remembering when a friend once told me to “never underestimate the power of the pussy!” It was her contention that pussy, in the hands of the wrong woman, could make the most intelligent man brain dead and bring him to his knees. Ginger is clearly that kind of woman, manipulating the two with the power of some pussy.

Ginger’s young, and dumb. Big words throw her for a loop and she’s perfectly content being barefoot and pregnant. I wanted to feel sorry for Ginger but I don’t. It’s becoming more and more apparent that Ginger knew full well what she was doing when she did it. One man wasn’t bringing the gravy to the table. Ginger has high hopes that the other will.

But sitting on the outside looking in, I can see something Ginger can’t. Something Ginger never bargained on. You see, boyfriend has a mother with experience Ginger can’t begin to touch. Boyfriend’s mama isn’t taking kindly to the mess Ginger has pulled her son into. Ginger has made herself an enemy and she doesn’t even know it yet. But she’ll soon learn that there’s not enough pussy power in the world that can keep a pissed off mother from trying to protect her baby boy. Hell will seem like a luxury vacation if mama goes on the warpath. I’m just hoping Ginger won’t have to learn that the hard way.

Friday, November 14, 2008


For those of you who are basking in the sexual revolution, getting your groove back or your freak on, be mindful. What you can do on the east coast of these here United States, might not be tolerable on the west coast.

Did you know it’s illegal to engage in oral sex in the following states: Alabama, Arizona, Florida, Idaho, Kansas, Louisiana, Massachusetts, Minnesota, Mississippi, Georgia, North and South Carolina, Oklahoma, Oregon, Rhode Island, Utah, Virginia and Washington D.C.? (I’m sorry, baby, but we’ll have to move if you want me to lick your lollipop!!)

And don’t be getting’ your man all hot and bothered behind these here borders because it’s illegal for your man’s erection to show through his clothing in these states: Arizona, Florida, Idaho, Indiana, Massachusetts, Mississippi, Nebraska, Nevada, New York, Ohio, Oklahoma, Oregon, South Dakota, Tennessee, Utah, Vermont, Washington D.C. and Wisconsin. (Really officer, I’m not happy, that’s a gun in my pocket. I swear!)

If you’re in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, don’t have sex with a truck driver in a tollbooth. It’s jail time for you if you do. (Now, you might be able to get around that one if you’re actually in a truck!)

It’s also illegal to have sex without a condom in Nevada.

Pity the poor girls in Willowdale, Oregon. Hubby can’t talk dirty in his wife’s ear during sex least he risk being arrested. (Yes, Judge, and then he starting moaning, "Oh, baby! Mud, slime, dust! I never heard such filth, your Honor!)

And for those of you in Newcastle, Wyoming, your fantasy of having sex in a butcher shop’s meat freezer is out of the question ‘cause the law says you can’t do the deed in the vicinity of frozen beef. (And I know that one was on the top of your fantasy list!)

So, if you’re traveling out and about and the moment should suddenly move you, tread on the side of caution. Don’t video tape a thing and deny it all.

Monday, November 10, 2008


Most in my inner circle know that my tastes tend to be very eclectic. My musical tastes in particular run the gamut from old school to hard rock. It all just depends on my mood of the moment what might be blaring from my stereo speakers and on occasion there are some strange things blaring. Lately I’ve been keeping my youngest child challenged with my musical selections as he strives to keep my ZUNE player up to my standards.

Sadly, one of my favorite performers, Miriam Makeba, the South African singer with the sultry voice that was at times like liquid gold passed away. Ms. Makeba was 76 years old and a true product of her environment. Her music reflected her experiences and it has touched my spirit many times since I discovered her some twenty years ago.

She was banned from her home country for more than thirty years under apartheid but she persevered, building a phenomenal musical career that touched millions. Nelson Mandela has said in a statement that, "her haunting melodies gave voice to the pain of exile and dislocation which she felt for 31 long years. At the same time, her music inspired a powerful sense of hope in all of us."

She was on stage, doing what she loved most as she performed in Italy when she collapsed. My deepest condolences to her family and friends. She will be dearly missed.

Wednesday, November 05, 2008


The people have spoken. We have an American president who is determined to change the status quo. Congratulations to Senators Obama and Biden. May they both, and their respecive families, be blessed in the weeks and months to come and may all of us come together for the greater good of our country.

Doing the happy dance, happy dance, happy dance. Snapping my fingers, whirling and twirling. Doing the happy dance!!!

Tuesday, November 04, 2008


Our right to vote came with much sacrifice. At the beauty parlor recently an elderly woman recalled the story of a young man she grew up with who years ago tried to register to vote. He was turned away and when he continued to try, refusing to accept the the ways of Jim Crow, he was lynched.

This old woman's health is failing. Her age has finally gotten the best of her. But she voted. She couldn't comprehend anyone not voting.

Men lost their lives, women suffered, and families endured overwheming travasties so that we could have a voice in our future. Honor our history and what was sacrified for us. Be a part of this historic moment is all of our lives. If you do nothing else today, go vote. If you've already voted, motivate someone else who might not. Do something!


Saturday, November 01, 2008


Don't ask me why, but I was having a memory lane moment. I posted this because when D'Angelo first came on the scene he so reminded me of my high school honey. SIGH!