Monday, December 31, 2018


2018 has been rough. Not gonna lie. I’ll be thrilled to see the year done and finished. Come midnight I plan to give Father Time a good swift kick and then I'll be waving both hands to welcome the Baby New Year. Every time I think about the last twelve months I get teary-eyed, wanting to burst out into the ugly cry. It was that rough! So rough that I couldn’t begin to comprehend the New Year being any better. Usually, when I reflect back, I am able to choke back the tears and pull myself together.
This past weekend I was blessed to be in the midst of greatness, celebrating with a gathering of women who lifted my spirit and helped me see the future in a whole other light. They were women of faith, coming together in such a dynamic manner that it would be impossible to deny the magic that happened in the home of our host. In that circle of sisterhood and friendship I found it nearly impossible to choke back the tears and so I cried. 
A good cry can be liberating. When tears flow, what felt insurmountable suddenly seems manageable. Tears can heal hurt and heartache and bring relief in ways that are often inconceivable. But a good cry, when you are being supported by women you trust and love, who openly pray for your healing and well-being, can be life-changing.
I am immensely blessed. Many of the women in the room came into my life when I needed them most and didn’t even know it. There have been friendships and bonds established that will last a lifetime. A few are family and I call them my sisters. I couldn't imagine my life without them. I also made new connections that bolstered my spirit with possibilities. They are all a community of support and encouragement. Huge shoulders to cry on when I find myself consumed by a storm. They have hearts so large and magnanimous that to be in their midst is to be blessed beyond measure. They are pure joy and light and love, and they shine in ways that are so tremendous that there aren’t enough words in the English language to express just how magnificent they are! These women SHINE and I believe they are Godsent.
2019 doesn’t have a clue what’s coming!

Tuesday, December 18, 2018


Not all of us greet the Christmas holiday with goodwill and cheer. I am often ready for it to be over when I see the Halloween decorations coming down. For some, the holiday takes an emotional toll on our spirits that doesn’t ring of cheer or happy.
I struggle with depression during the holidays, most especially if it’s been a rough year. I know that I’m not alone. Irrational expectations, money concerns, and the occasional holiday hazard can easily throw the best of us into a tailspin.
But it doesn’t have to be all-consuming and if we prepare ourselves, we can get ourselves through the season.
First, have a game plan. Be ready to take care of yourself as the end of the year descends on us. Include reading a book, or napping, into your schedule. Take time for you. Self-care is the best care because you know best what you need. Make you a priority.
Next, ready yourself for family conflict and avoid it. It’s okay to say no to discussions that will get your bra straps twisted. Tell family to bring it to you in the New Year and avoid it then, too. Keep your person on speed dial in case you need a sympathetic ear and let them know you may need them. They’ll be there.
No one has a perfect holiday so don’t be fooled into thinking yours has to be. It doesn’t. If decorating or buying gifts overwhelms you, don’t do it. Delegate if you have people willing to take on the tasks. Make a list of what makes you happy this time of the year and just do that if it will make it easier for you.
If you are mourning a loved one, talk about your feelings or reach out to a support group. Just don’t think you have to endure it alone. Unless you just want to. It’s okay to feel whatever you might be feeling, and you don’t owe anyone an apology for how you feel.
Rest, rest and rest well. Don’t let holiday activities disrupt your sleep schedule. Maintaining a schedule that insures you get sleep will work wonders for your body and your spirit.
Lastly, just focus on what matters. The rest will take care of itself, or not. Worrying about it won’t change the outcome, so don’t. And remember, NO is a complete sentence that requires no further explanation. Tis the season to do what’s important for your well-being.