Monday, January 05, 2009


So the New Year came in with a bang and just like clockwork the drama got thick quick!

Pamela cried, convinced that no one believes her, swearing that she is neither delusional nor crazy. I listened to her story and though, on the surface, it seemed a bit far-fetched, I recognized that her fear was very, very real.

Pamela has been amazingly happy. A great career, wonderful new guy, and an amazing teenage daughter keep her very fulfilled. Last year she left behind a dysfunctional and abusive relationship to find herself some peace of mind. Her ex-hubby was prone to extremes. Extreme mood swings, extreme tantrums, extreme behavior. So much so that he scared her, leaving her fearful for her own safety more times than she cared to count. When she left she spent months peering over her shoulder waiting for him to pounce and attack. Then there was nothing.

No calls, no conversation, nada. The quiet was unnerving at first but then Pamela fathomed the brother had moved on to other people and other things, finally allowing her to move on with her own life.

A few months ago the daughter announces that her dear daddy claimed to have been diagnosed with a brain tumor. According to Pamela the man rationalized that this illness was the reason for his usually bizarre behavior. Then once again, nothing. No talk of treatment, medical reports, nothing. Still sharing health insurance Pamela checked with their plan administrator to see if any claims had been filed for the husband and as she suspected, there was nothing. Everyone Pamela spoke to said it was bizarre but told her to just leave it alone because it really wasn’t her problem any longer.

Two weeks ago the ex-hubby announces he would be headed for the hospital to have a hole drilled into his skull to relieve the pressure. When questioned by the daughter his answers were vague at best. Then this past Saturday the ex-hubby takes off for places unknown. He claimed a family friend was taking him to the hospital for his brain surgery and he’d be back in seven days. He gave the daughter no other information, not even bothering to let her know what hospital he would be in. Pamela has called all of their mutual friends and her ex-in-laws to see what they know and there is no information to be found. The man is not registered in any local hospital and now Pamela is scared.

“It’s an alibi,” she whispered, looking around to see who might be listening. “I wouldn’t put it past him to have concocted this foolishness to get to me.” Pamela is terrified that her ex is using this opportunity to stalk her in order to do her harm. “I wouldn’t put it past him to try and kill me thinking he can really get away with it,” she muttered through her tears. “Really, unless he’s up to no good, then why all the secrecy and why all the lies?”

I’m with Pamela, even if she is crazy AND delusional. Brain tumor, hospital, drilling holes? Why such a lie unless the man is truly up to no good?

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